This space holds small shoots from the present moment, each now a part of my evolving past. It's a journal of unfiltered thoughts and whispered poems, where my ideas, observations, and feelings freely find their voice. I'm sharing them just as they emerge from the quiet spaces within.
PD. New items are always added at the top
I FORGOT, LOVE
I forgot how it feels,
a hug filled with love,
a kiss filled with love,
I guess I forgot how it feels to be loved.
I can't remember how it feels,
how is it like to be in someone's mind,
and to be loved...
I forgot what it feels like to be loved... by you
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CHAOS
There is something I can't explain,
I feel it running through my veins,
it's like the universe has auto-compressed,
and somehow got inside me, I can't comprehend.
I feel it when I close my eyes,
I feel it when I set an intention,
I feel it when I speak,
I feel it when I dream...
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THERE WAS A SEED
There is a seed
that was once planted in soil.
There is a seed
that sooner or later it will transform.
There is a root
where once there was a seed,
now is a rootm
attaching strongly to the soil.
There is a leaf,
where only a root existed,
Now a leaf has emerged
where there was a seed.
From the seed now,
life has emerged,
as above, so below;
we only see the surface,
but the root is what makes the plant emerge...
to exist.
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UNTITLED 3
When I say I'm in pain,
I don't mean that my body is aching;
I mean that my mind, my heart, and my soul are bleeding 'till death.
A dead that seems impossible to reach.
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FROM MY MIND
Sometimes I feel trapped,
and I can't escape,
is not that I want to,
but sometimes I feel like I need to.
My mind gets faster,
it goes faster than time,
faster than space,
and faster than me.
I love it,
and I hate too.
I want to escape,
I want to feel free
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UNTITLED
I can see,
through my eyes,
all the planets,
all the stars,
all the nature,
all the existence,
I can see everything,
everything that might exist
only in my mind.
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LAUNDRY PILE
Time is running faster than my laundry pile.
I blink, and the pile gets bigger.
I blink again, and only half was done.
Time is running fast,
and my laundry pile
runs faster than me.
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LOOSING MY MIND
There were people before me,
people who saw it all, and nothing at all,
who felt everything, and nothing at all.
There will be people after me,
people who will see all, and nothing at all,
who will feel everything, and nothing at all.
And here I am,
seeing it all and nothing at all,
feeling everything and nothing at all.
I am only sure of my existence,
but not of the existence of anything at all.
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TIRED
I'm tired.
Today is one of those days,
where I feel that my heart is still broken,
where I can't find the glue to keep it together.
I'm tired.
Life hasn't been easy,
and I mean, I don't expect it to be...
but I feel like I need one day of rest,
one day with no broken pieces,
one day is just what I need.
I need to feel that everything is alright,
I need to know that everything is fine.
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ONE OF THEM
When I see nature,
I see the past,
I see the present,
and I see the future.
I walk where those before me did,
I see what those before me saw,
I smell what those before me smelt.
I do these things in the present,
and I acknowledge that at some time,
I will become one of those,
those who were here before.
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SOME DAYS
Some days I just exist.
Some days I just sleep.
Some days I just survive
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BROKEN
I feel so broken,
and I don't even know how
to put my pieces back together.
I'm sorry that my broken pieces
are hurting you,
it's not my intention to drown you with me
--------
SURVIVING
There are some good days,
there are some bad days,
and there are just days.
My heart was broken a 27,
it's been 48 days to be exact,
and I can't figure out exactly how,
am I supposed to put the pieces back?
I haven't found any stability yet
some days, my mind feels good,
but still, my body is aching, it's tired...
My body is just surviving.
SOUNDS
I never thought,
that the sounds one day I loved,
today, they will make me cry.
The sound of your voice,
the sound of your laugh,
the sound of you.
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...OF MY OWN REALITY
I am the water that runs in the ocean,
I am the air that blows with the wind,
I am the soil that helps plants bloom,
I am the fire that runs through my veins.
I am the time sitting down in outer space,
I am the space that patiently awaits,
I am everything and nothing,
I am the observer and the creator.
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IMAGES IN MY MIND
I'm sitting down in a chair
and then, I look to my right,
there's a table,
and in the table, a big flower bouquet.
I smile,
I smell them,
I smile again,
and the you give me a kiss.
--------
LAST CHRISTMAS
Last Christmas,
I gave you my heart,
but the really next year,
you throw it away...
or how it was?
--------
THOUGHTS
My thoughts have always been loud,
they used to be active all day,
and sometimes, all night,
they screamed at me, but I wasn't listening.
I spent too much time ignoring them,
or just hearing what they say,
but never understood what they meant,
why were there?
Lately, I have learnt to listen,
I have learnt to observe.
I have learnt to understand,
and they have get quiet.
--------
MY PLANTS
Today I watered my plants,
they were already screaming for water,
but I was not listening.
When I finished watering,
I asked them to forgive me,
Gave them love and finished with a promise
of not letting them scream for water ever again.
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UNTITLED 2
Everything feels chaotic,
everything feels non-sense,
everything feels like an illusion
that is about to become a nightmare.
Every time I close my eyes,
I see our future,
and it's not bright,
not even a future.
I feed my soul with the darkness,
but always wish from the heart,
that the chaos and the illusion
are only part of my mind.
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I DON'T WANT TO
I can't escape,
but I don't want to.
I can't stop,
but I don't want to.
That's how it feels,
that's what it is.
--------
PATIENCE
I need to sit down and let time pass by,
I need to sit down and observe my outside,
sometimes my inner voice gets messy,
and doesn't let me think clearly.
But when I sit down and observe time,
I become one within and without,
and suddenly, my mind slows down,
and quiets the noise.
--------
ORANGE
There was a flower,
sitting alone in the living room,
her beauty made the room look pretty,
and filled with power.
Her colour was orange,
like the sun, like the fruit,
like the morning and the sunsets
that I love to see.
There was a flower,
and now it's gone,
I'm just hoping that next spring,
a new flower will bloom.
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THE PLACE
There's a little place,
where I like to be,
a little place,
that I'm familiar with.
It is a place,
that makes me feel warm,
that makes me feel love,
that makes me feel...
That place is in me...
that place IS ME.
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OPEN EYES
When I close my eyes,
I can feel the call,
the call to wake up,
to raise what's inside me.
When I close my eyes,
I can see our history,
I can feel our existence,
I can sense the future.
When I close my eyes,
they get wide open,
they allow me to see things
that I can't see with open eyes
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CLOUDS
On cloudy days,
the sun we can't see,
but above all of the clouds,
the sun still shines.
Even when the warmth you can't feel,
sooner or later, it will warm you again.
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COLLAPSING
I'm tired of feeling,
my feelings are overwhelming,
they are drowning me,
taking me into darkness.
I have never seen this dark,
I have never felt so down,
I have never ache this bad,
and yet, I'm still alive.
How many more days until I collapse?